Dargquon Ql'deleodna

dude, this story rocks!!! there were a few minor grammar mistakes, here is one that particularly bothered me " He quickly looked over to the man on the bed to ...

this is very well written and it reminds me allot of the book called The Speed of Darkness , it seems a allot like that story. over all a little ...

umm.... this is good :? ..... i like how... you messed with mutliple little songs and poems, to mak up a p oem, this is weird :?

i dont think my embarrasing moment tops your but it was till pretty out there. this was like a couple of months ago, this took place in band practice. I ...

cool, this is good, i like how each little stanza is all connected some how, except i dont see a connection between all of the stanza's or are they a ...

wow, even more mystery, this story is beggining to get even better, is the shadow the character, or are we just looking from his veiw point at the time and ...

it didnt have much rythm , but it was nice. it was quite selfcentered; although the spelling may have been wrong in quite a few places, it was fine other ...

a briefcase is there weapon of preference if they get you, you might be in for a life-long sentence cute little poem you got there zel, i saw how the ...

this is good, it is just depressing, and doesnt seem to flow well, possibly if you rearanged some words or removed or changed some lines it would flow. this seems ...

very nice hook to the story, i want to read more, post more, please, come on. your off to a good start, and its always societies fault, sheesh everyone knows ...

wow, this is awsome, this also reminds me of a book, well a series of books, the antagonist in many of them, the assasin Artemis Entrei, very very good swords ...

i actually think this story is great, it is way better than anything ive written, keep it up, and keep posting, i like it. although itcould be split up into ...

yep you added some stuff, its good stuff too, im wondering how duleclaz overpowered lady's mind, and took control of her,now she is going to get raped as youcould say ...

a little bit of description would be very helpfull, because i have no clue were this is, and how come people can withstand a grenade blowing up right infront of ...

this is a good start, a little more discription would be nice, but that can be covered in chapeter 3, you need to tell us (dont have too just would ...